yes hate. i know it's harsh.

but i wish she would just DIE.

die.

die

die.

yes i'm an ungrateful dog, so what ?

don't like me?

now do you regret having me?

now do you wish you should have aborted me?

or do you wish for me to leave?

cause i would gladly let you book that ticket back home.

no, i don't want or need you.

you can be alone.

ALL BY YOUR FUCKING SELF.

I DON'T GIVE A DAMN.

you irritate the shit out of me.

you are so fucking ironic.

you are a two faced bitch who broke my family up.

you could have been smart and did all your shit when I WASN'T BORN.

no, i really don't care about you.

yes i'm still wish hard that you would die.

yes, god, kill me if you want, let me suffer all you want.

i do not care.

yes it hurts me a hella lot, but i'm willing to take this pain in,

yes i have anger in my heart.

so what, both you and your ex husband left that in me.

that's all i feel all the time unconsciously.

i don't want to listen to your fucking voice, i don't want to hear you rant about your shit and how you feel.

fuck the "better to understand, than to be understood"

just fuck it.

i am the way i am because of both you and your ex.

i don't want to be your kid.

go live with your patrick, and samantha.

"oh samantha likes bacon"

and samantha this, samantha that.

why don't you just make her your real daughter huh?

i'll be the step.

YES I WILL LEAVE THE HOUSE WHEN IM 18.

I ASSURE YOU, AND I WILL NOT CALL YOU MOM EVER.

happy?

rest assured, i hate you as much as i hate my life.

love,

Nika.

or more like, us commenting on something.

and his "last" favour from him to me before i left singapore was that making sure that tracy loh

was 6 feet under.

i actually totally forgot about it, well DUH, because i wouldn't do such a thing.

i'll let karma play her role in this.

tracy's going to get fucked up real bad in time to come.

funny how i only remembered this after a couple of weeks later.

And lewis is being such a dickhead.

dude, i get it okay, you have weed.

stop camming with me and showing it to me.

yes honey, we will meet up soon :D

WOOTS, london pride ;)

haha.

random fucks.

and jordan is annoyed with lewis.

no this isn't any of your concern.

(to whoever is reading this post)

it's just a random thing i felt like saying because i am forcing myself to stay up as long as i can, so that by the time i fall asleep, i cannot wake up in time for church, therefore forcing mum to let me sleep while only she attends.

yes, i still cannot bring myself to go to church.

no matter what.

i will always find it boring.

anyone care to try and change what i think about going to church?

because the only reason you said them was because you were so mad you just needed to let some frustration out.

yeah me.

when i get angry, i say bullshit.

bullshit i never meant.

so i am typing :D

:P

i finally updated my time in my laptop.

more like, changed it to London timing.

i'm bored.

my head hurts.

i want to eat but i'm too lazy.

i need to get my crazy back.

<3

well, more like yesterday, and it was nice.

i miss him, alot :(

and i fell asleep on him D:

how horrible can it get huh?

but he still promises me stuff like how he would when we were together.

Raf talked to me :D

haha, i have so much more covers up on youtube now :)

oh and of course.

i'm feeling that way now.

and i'm not calming down anytime soon.

and now, i have the chance too.

but why does it pain me to leave?

isn't this what i want?

or maybe it's because i'm so attached to certain people here.

i honestly don't know, even if leaving for a short period already makes me berserk,

what about forever?